Insomnia

I’ve been a terrible sleeper for as long as I can remember…..

If I’m not having trouble getting to sleep, I’m having trouble staying asleep.

I was about 12 years old when I started doing random things to keep myself occupied when my family was sleeping. There were the 2 am hamburgers, the 3 am Tae Bo workouts, the midnight stargazing on the back deck, and let me not forget the 4 am laundry session. After that stunt, my Dad banned me to my bedroom by 1 am every night because the laundry room shared a wall with my parents’ bedroom. My bad!

I just could not sleep, at least not like everyone else I knew. No matter what I did or how early I tried to settle in, my brain would not slow down enough for me to get a consistent night of sleep. Melatonin, Sleepy Time Tea, Night Sound machines, Sleep Masks, Homemade Blackout shades, you name it I tried it. I read articles, watched the experts on Oprah and even tried a few brands of over the counter sleeping pills. All to no avail. I was still stirring aimlessly when I needed to be asleep.

This went on for years. It was so bad that I became infamous among my friends as the girl they could ask to pick them up from the airport at the crack of dawn because they knew I’d be awake. I even developed a habit of calling my friends on the West Coast because the 3 hour time difference meant that I had someone to talk to.

As I entered my early 20’s I stopped looking at my inability to sleep as a bad thing. The truth is, I rarely felt tired the next day and after numerous visits to the doctor (love you Mom!) I wasn’t suffering from any health issues due to lack of sleep. I could cram for an exam without consequence and I got my best bursts of creativity during the wee hours of the morning. I’d sit at my little second-hand sewing machine until sunrise and end up with a new outfit to wear that day. I would joke that I was a vampire well before Twilight was a thing.

Now that I’m older (and don’t even think about asking me how old because that would just be rude!). A few things have changed. I’m still no champion sleeper, but I am finding more success in the sleep department. I try to get in at least an hour’s worth of physical activity at least 5 times a week, I try to keep my nighttime intake of sweets to a minimum and I try to get into bed around the same time every night. Notice I said try because sometimes I run out of hours in the day before I get to my workout and sometimes donuts just happen. (Please don’t judge me!).

More importantly, I no longer try to fall asleep, sleep either comes or it doesn’t. If I find that I’m not sleeping I get out of bed. No more staring at the clock or asking Alexa how many hours are left before I have to get up. I read, I write, I get in a few hours of driving Rideshare (I’m only half kidding). I still see my doctor regularly to make sure I’m not headed toward a health crisis and I keep my eyes peeled for that foolproof home remedy that will put me to sleep before my head hits the pillow.

Other than that, I try not to stress. Sweet dreams everyone, and if you find yourself unable to sleep, drop me a line, I just might be awake.